Biltmore

This post is less about Biltmore than it is about our two year anniversary which happened to be two weeks ago on September 17th. I'm just now getting to this post because one I feel like there is so much to say and yet I didn't really know how I wanted to say it. Two, Biltmore was the "formal" celebration of said anniversary, so why not wait till after our trip to write about it.

     At this time last year Gray and I were sitting across the table from one another at La Parpardella staring out the window at the cobbled streets in Spain. We were thoroughly enjoying our Italian food (because anything that wasn't Mercedes' food was amazing) while reflecting back on everything that had occurred during out first year of marriage. We counted ourselves quite lucky, we were living in Spain, taking every opportunity to enjoy our surroundings and to see other countries and we were finishing school in December. The world lay at our fingertips and our lives were just starting. Even though Spain had it's difficulties, that didn't mean we weren't optimistic about the future. 

     Fast forward to this past weekend as we made our way to Asheville, not quite the celebration trip Gray had imagined, but that in and of itself truly represents out relationship at this point; learning. There's a give and take we are still trying to figure out. We've officially moved past the honeymoon phase and this past year has presented new challenges we have had to learn how to overcome as a couple. 

     We arrived home from Spain and had two weeks with our sweet families before loading up the u-haul and moving all of our crap (which we have too much of ... how did we collect so much in one year or marriage?) to South Carolina. Gray had gotten a job at Summit Church as one of their campus worship pastors so with that taken care of, it was time for me to follow suit. But it wasn't that easy. We knew Gray's income would make due alongside the funds that we had saved up, but it wouldn't cover us forever. For Gray, this knowledge was slightly more stressful than for me, you could say I'm not the most money conscious person. So we made the smart decision to get a dog during that time. [Rabbit trail ...We always knew we wanted a dog, maybe two, so why not get started while one of us was at home? That way it could be quickly crate and potty trained. Eh, it sounds logical but no one tells you how stinking expensive man's best friend can be. We lucked out in that Riggs has a great personality, but jeez the allergies! Those doctor visits really add up.] So with three mouths to feed instead of two we were hoping for something. On Valentines day our stress was eliminated, I started work at a great company. Obstacle one down! 

     Come March we had gotten into the swing of things and we were super excited because our best friends were getting married in Cleveland. It was our first time seeing friends and family since moving. The positive, it was a great refreshing trip, the negative, it made us realize how much we valued and how much we were lacking those types of relationships in Greenville. So we started praying that God would provide people we could connect with. I know you have to give this time, but for someone as socially wired as Gray it can be a hard wait. Little by little through Monday Night Crew and through sheer will power to stick ourselves out there, we are making strides. I wouldn't say we've overcome this obstacle, but we're working on it!

     So moving through to May, the grind and normalcy of adult life finally set in. My heart was in a rough place and I started to grumble and complain. My free spirit felt trapped behind a boring desk at an eight to five job, so I became a constant thorn in Grayson's side. I couldn't say one positive thing about my job, it was all "horrible," I hated everything. I quickly learned if you're always looking for the negative, you will find it (something Gray learned last year). I don't know what it was that finally kicked me in the gut, but slowly I started dying to myself. I realized that God had provided this job for our family and even though if might be for an indefinable season of my life, he was calling me towards more than a life of protest. Cue the apologies. Obstacle three down!

     Around the same time, Gray decided to go back to school. If anyone were to tell Gray more school was in his future I would have laughed. He was so adamantly opposed which is why it came as such a surprise when he decided to get his MDiv. It definitely added a whole new layer to our lives but in thinking about the future and how we plan on supporting ourselves and future kids should we have them, he wanted to make sure we were moving in the right direction. So he learned to manage two jobs, a dog, his sanity and after all that he still finds time for me. Obstacle four down!
     It probably seems like this year has been an endless challenge (I use that word loosely knowing that others have faced way worse), but there have been so many good things in the midst of the muck. Gray and I have continued to grow. Moving away from family was one of the best things for us. It was kinda like spreading our wings for the first time since being married. The decisions we made were our own and the challenges we faced we faced together. We had to have the important discussions without relying on anyone else to carry the weight of  tough decisions but each other. It's made me extremely grateful. I've realized just how selfless Gray can be and just how selfish I can be (and vice verse). I don't think Gray and I went into marriage with fancy illusions, but a realistic attitude doesn't necessarily save you from everything. There will inevitably be issues uncovered and eventually your flaws will be unmasked. So thank goodness for grace!
     I look back over this past year and feel empowered, Christ revealed himself to Gray and I in so many ways. I've continued to learn so much about myself and our relationship and I've continued to grow. I think I'm just as excited if not more excited to continue along this road. I love you Gray, life would look bleak without you in it! Here's to 80 more years (ha, maybe for you, but not for me)!

     This post wasn't meant to be so extremely long, but because so much happens in a year I guess it was unavoidable. 

On my mind.

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

A fall activity.

Yesterday after church Gray and I and a couple of our friends headed into the mountains to enjoy the crisper weather and a fun fall activity. I've been wanting to visit Sky Top Orchard for a couple of weeks because a) I love apples, and b) the orchard is set in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains. 

It's about an hour drive from where we live, but winding through tall wooded mountains under clear blue skies that are dotted with the occasional cotton ball cloud, does not make for a terrible afternoon. So we loaded up the cars with all the essentials (aka. us and some mullah) and had a grand old time enjoying each others company while looking for the biggest most colorful apples both in and out of reach. 

               

If I had to complain about anything it would be the extremely large amount of people who also had the brilliant idea to visit the orchard, but it wasn't the end of the world. Indeed, we were able to find an few uninhabited trees from which we gleamed prize winning fruit. Perseverance is key I tell you.

      

P.S. the cute baby belongs to none of the above photographed people. Henry, I seemed to have missed the shot of you with your beautiful parents. Rob and Linds next time, I promise! :)

Still a puppy.

     10 months bubb and you're not terrible. I feel lucky that we didn't pick a Marley (from the book "Marley & Me), we actually picked a pretty easy going dog. You definitely have your annoying habits, like showering with either your dad or I and then deciding to get out when you please, making puddles all over the house. Begging, which is weird because you don't really love food that much, at least, it doesn't always motivate you like I think it should. Oh, and you practically drag us to the dog park, you'd think choking would send an understandable message, but no, I think you like it. Also, you love people too much and that means if they aren't paying ample attention to you, you make your presence know (i.e. by jumping on them), don't worry we're working on it. You've done surprisingly well in your doggie training classes, I can't believe graduation is tomorrow! It's too soon really, your not quite ready. I guess we'll just have to wait for level two to start, maybe the stuff you didn't pick up in level one will catch on . . . maybe. You are cute though, at least you've got that going for ya.You really weren't into having your picture taken. You'll learn :) 

Derailed but up and running again.

     I hate that the smallest thing can derail me. I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one that struggles with being disciplined, but gosh darn it, sometimes it feels that way. I always have such good intentions, and then something gets in the way and it takes me 30 days to get on track again. I always come back feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. So guilty, why can't I just start something and stick with it? I guess this lack of discipline that invades almost every aspect of my life is trying to get my attention and say, "Jak, LISTEN, that's what grace is all about, no matter how good your intentions are, you'll never be perfect, but that's okay, because I sent my son to wash clean your stains and make you blameless, guiltless in my eyes so just keep on keeping on." Hmm, I can't wait for the day when my small, finite brain finally gets grace. For now I'll just accept this unfathomable gift and keep going, keep persevering, knowing that this dreamer might get lost in the forrest, but only until she realizes the path home is clearly marked and easy to follow. . .
     Gray and I have been caught up in life lately. Enjoying the end of summer, friends, castle episodes, our crazy dog, and food. I haven't taken a ton of pictures, my fingers starting to twitch so there will be more soon. I'll leave you with this:
Is there really a better fruit than peaches? Especially when they go in pie . . .

Which leads me to the library, because one day I will own a garden with several fruit trees.

But all that healthy stuff needs some balance so we decided to make fried chicken (so good).The last couple of photos are from our Labor Day trip to the Hendersonville Apple Festival and a peek at Asheville. Ya know, just to wrap up this randomness.